What Drives the Weak
by a song for jeffrey
Summary: SetoxJoey. Joey recalls past events, and remembers the times he spent with Seto. He may have slowly moved on, but it is now impossible for me to ever forget you.


**(A/n: ya hi! Lol I hope you like this story...it's a one shot.. And... ya! enjoy!)**

**What Drives the Weak**

**Joey's POV**

A note.

A small slip of paper left for an uncertain reader.

Unexpecting, hopeful.

I opened my locker, and out it fell.

The message which could certainly not be for me.

I bent down to pick it up. I felt uneasy.

There was no one around. No one left there to oversee my actions.

The writing inside the note was neat.

Un-humanly neat. Perfection. The handwriting of an angel.

The fallen angel in my History class. Tense. Cold. Un-lonely. Or so it may seem.

He was the one I loved. Though I would never admit to these feelings out loud.

I gave a sigh which meant somewhere along the lines of "I'm hopeless" and began to read the note.

_"So mutt how's it been? Not that I really care about your life. The world would probably be better off if you were 6 feet under it. So, I guess you must be wondering why I would ever write to someone as useless as you. But you see, that's the problem. You aren't quite useless. In fact, I can't believe I'm writing this, (but I know that if I don't say something, I'll go insane. ) I think my opinion of you has changed. Or maybe I just disguised it with mean words and bad actions. I, (if I don't come out and say it now, I never will) think I love you. You captivate me, for some odd reason. So, well, I seem to be at a loss for words (never happens to me?). You need not respond to this, for I do not expect you to do anything about these feelings. I can not control who I am attracted to. So, I'm sorry. Yes, I am apologizing. I'm sorry for the hurt, and the name calling, but above all, I'm sorry about what you are reading now, for it is true._

_Love,_

_Seto Kaiba"_

I was shaking, trembling slightly. I must be delirious.

Yes.

Slap me, pinch me, do something to bring me back to reality. Out of this dream state, no matter how wonderful it seemed.

I thought I was over him. Over my little "crush".

Was this a joke? I couldn't bring myself to believe that.

Could the boy I tried so hard to get close to, want the same thing from me?

I walked out of the school, only to see you turn.

Turn away from me and walk.

Somewhat far ahead of me.

Your eyes, they turned away when I walked out.

Was there something you wanted to tell me?

After debating with my mind for a minute, I followed you.

I ran after you. And just as your ride started to pull away, I reached you.

I fell against the glass, panting.

The car stopped, and you rolled your window down.

My focus was brought to your eyes.

Deep pools of blue, drowning me, but I didn't have a desire to break away from them.

My heart jumped and I wished for nothing more than to just look into them. But you opened your door.

Opened the door to let me in. More than a friend.

You trusted me for some strange reason.

But I trusted you too.

_You're stealing my heart again_

_With every single move you make._

_You conquer over me with every glance of your blue eyes. _

_I am helpless for you._

_I am helpless for you. _

In your house, where we used to go so often, you were like a different person. You became someone else. Not nicer, but not any more cruel than what people thought of you.

I was weak when around you. You had this strange power to make me feel breathless.

Shirtless, you sat.

On the couch my heart pounded as you began to do the same to me. Undressing me. Disarming me of the only protection I had.

See my chest rapidly moving? Panting out of nervousness. Anxiety.

What was happening?

Can you hear my heart? It beats for you.

but then it stopped.

You leaned down, pressing your lips onto mine, and forcing me to rest my head on the arm of the couch.

It was clear now that you were correct. You are master, and I am not prepared to do anything but be near you.

I was in bliss, though it may not seem that way, but my struggling just makes this moment all the more satisfactory for you.

You had on a playful grin. You really were enjoying yourself. Was this the first time you were really happy?

I didn't smile outwardly, but I was not unhappy.

This was the best, and also the most stressful moment in my short life so far.

All of your pain, your stress, your frustrations were being spilled out.

I would become your relief.

I would help you, in the only way I knew how without messing things up. I would let you dominate me, for the sake of your happiness.

_Hear the sound of my heart_

_Pounding in my chest, for you._

_I am helpless for you._

_I am helpless for you. _

But happiness is a fleeting emotion, and as they say, all good things must come to an end.

And so it did.

We ended, and it was my fault. When I was diagnosed, your eyes slowly began to turn grey.

I rarely saw you smile after that.

Leukemia, they called it.

But there was no treatment for me.

I was the 1 in 20 people who do not respond to the medication. (1)

With two months left to live, you spent a fortune running test after test on me, hoping that somehow we might be able to cheat death.

But with only a week left, you began to slowly give up hope.

You couldn't look at me. I saw the pain in your eyes.

The pain that was being caused by me. And this time I didn't know how to make it stop.

I was useless to you. I was making you suffer.

The day came for me to go. Looking down at everyone who came to pay their respects was a little different, but I think it was good to be able to see the Earth from a different view.

There were many more people at my grave than I had expected.

You made me promise, when I was alive, that when I left the earth, I would still be with you.

That I would have an impact on how you lived your life.

I do, every day in with you.

Not like a stalker, but more in a guardian angel type of way. I'm sure you would like the ways I have impacted your life so far.

I sent her to you. A lonely girl, who needed you as much as you needed her.

I see you smile with her now, and it makes me happy just to know that you've moved on.

_I miss you more_

_More than words could describe_

_I miss you more_

_More than words could describe. _

_(1)_ my statistics are not true lol.... i really dont know how many people do not respond to the medication, but, i wanted to put that in there, if you know, then feel free to inform me!

a/n: lol so... please review... it would make me soo happy if you did. the song in here is by " Slow Comming Day" and the song is called "captivated". they are a band from so go check them out! thats all. thank you soo much for reading this!)


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